Maybe he should have made you go to kindergarten so you could learn how to share! Who just keeps two dicks all to themselves?!

You’d better have the matcha next time, or else!

Maybe for you. Something about giant bottles overhead does something exciting for me.

That would be fantastic, lmao.

I sure hope we get to that level of body modification in my lifetime. Imagine you unzip their pants with your teeth, only to be met by a monster, which makes you ecstatic enough, and then (!!!) you get to taste some delicious flavor of milkshake at the finish line.

Well, I keep trying to get people to pour habanero juice on themselves before blocking my windpipe, but no one wants to try it. Something about sensitive skin.

A thousand bucks? No, sorry, but I do have other things that could help. Holes that could be filled in your life.

Right? Either one of them would get me, but both together? Meeeow.

Just look at the sort of pelvic accessory you’re not interested in (bi people, I’m sorry)

Lol, I don’t know whether I’m like, “I like people,” because the whole ‘hole is hole’ thing, or the hole is a hole is wholly because of “I like people.” The things I want to do with my mouth, and to all people’s holes… well, whatever part is chiming in is chiming in with an entire carillon.

I’ll bet that it’s due to the trend we’ve seen in the last couple of decades: fewer close friends, if any at all.

If there was a restaurant that would let me service the hot male waitstaff between courses, I would be a daily patron.

I’ve never understood how that’s an insult. It’s like shouting, “Hey, you! Yeah, you, who does that thing that I really want you to do to to me! You do that thing! HA! Loser!”

Like, anyone here not want me to do them a quickie? Bet you I can inhale your entire wang and sack at the same time without gagging.

Aw, man, I hate seeing your name, but always love seeing that it’s you. I wish I could make it better for you.

Only if I can include other various phallic shaped objects in the contest.

I think that already IS an episode isn’t it? I distinctly recall something about a rodeo where the clowns end up being gay, but it was bill that got mistaken for one of them after he found joy in being a clown?

And here I thought sticking mine on the side of my house was the way to go…

It’s not my mouth that I want tall, long, and thicksome to be stopping in. Getting it all the way into the throat makes it feminine again.

I don’t know what the url is, but I remember as a wee child exploring the internet before pictures were quick to load, and the text was all we had, finding a story about a wife discovering her husband sexting with another woman. They proceeded to surprise him, and yes, a strap-on was pulled from a bag. The only phrase from the story that I can recall was him describing it as a telephone pole being shoved up his ass.

…I’ve never been able to find it again. If you find such a thing, don’t ever let it escape you.

I’ll take some of those. I bet some will even be happy with just one.

Heh, appreciate what you’ve got, matey. It is amazing in relationships when things line up like that, whether sexual or in other areas.