I’ve had biryani countless times but never thought about eating it with my hands. As today would have been Charlie’s 32nd birthday, I decided to put my judgement about him aside and see if I could eat one portion without scratching my anus, something that Charlie thought the average person does constantly.
Mine might be unusually insensitive, but I didn’t have to scratch once. I may be getting overconfident, but I’m fairly certain I may go the whole week or even the entire month without needing to scratch it.
So farewell Charlie Kirk. I will remember you on this day even though you could clearly never remember to wipe.
Edit: It seems that the image of Charlie Kirk’s tweet was actually fake, so I’m going to have to admit that I should have checked first. But I still managed to have some biryani, so I won anyway.
Edit 2: I decided to check if CK ever commented on Mamdani’s biryani video, and wasn’t surprised to find a video of him being racist about it. He called eating without utensils “unclean”, which suggests he doesn’t wash his hands. https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=1128637712625322&id=100064373126203
There was a video of Mamdani eating biryani (the traditional way) with his hands, and there were images of a tweet from Charlie that said it was " unbelievably disgusting" because he doubted that Mamdani has to “scratch his anus any less than the rest of us.”
Looking into it further, it actually appears that the image was fake, but an excuse to eat biryani is an excuse to eat biryani.
Skill issue on Kirk’s part, everyone knows you use the left hand for wiping and the right hand for eating anyway.
I want to believe that Charlier Kirk, who is definitely still alive and faked his own death, had pinworms or something